I’m a nearly 30 year old, undomesticated, slovenly

I’m a nearly 30 year old, undomesticated, slovenly wreck.  Last weekend, I did not speak to or listen to anyone the entire day.  Silence is luxuriant to me; it’s better than than dipping into a warm bubble bath.

I just had a very emotional weekend.  On Friday, my cell phone went bizerk in front of the Grand Poopahs of the Establishment, and I lost every single voicemail, video and picture I had saved to my cell phone of my Dad.  It took HOURS to recover them thanks to brilliant folks at the Apple store.  And I have been in a first rate funk ever since.

It’s just all so hard.  Single handily running a household is hard work.  I look back out how bright pictures of me from a few years ago looked.  I glowed.  The glow of  a girl who has the wind always at her back.  I still smile with my soul, through my eyes, but I haven’t glowed in awhile.

So, this weekend, I’m trying yet another intervention.  I’m trying out a CrossFit.  I have to find a way to feel better about myself.  I need the endorphin crack.  I need to loose this ridiculous weight that is slowly edging me out of the gene pool.  And mostly, I need to laugh again.  The laugh of a happy girl rather than the sigh of an overworked women.  I don’t know what combination of interventions its going to take to get me back to normal.  MollyMaids cleaning my house.  Vacations.  Exercise.  Hugs.  Something. I need professional help to whip my house and my physique back into shape.  But this time next year, I’m going to be the women I want to be, so help me God, I’ll be her.


One thought on “I’m a nearly 30 year old, undomesticated, slovenly

  1. I love your spirit and determination. Your dad would want you to spring back. It’s normal to be depressed after loosing someone close, like your dad. But it’s time to get back into the life you were meant to live. He would be so pleased…

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